So, the Giant Cheese Board event was an absolute disaster and people are fuming
If there’s one rule in life to follow, it’s this: If something seems too good to be true, it usually is.
Take a festival that promises unlimited cheese and mulled wine, for example.
You conjure up dreams of swimming in a fondue of gruyere, using little slices of soda bread for paddles and taking breaths only to streamline some hot, spicy wine.
The reality, however, is a few chunks of dried up brie and a pile of yeasty crumbs.
This weekend was the Giant Cheese Board – a cheese festival that promised to be the answer to everyone’s cheesy dreams.
For nearly £40, visitors were told to expect unlimited free cheese and mulled wine served by waiters dressed as mice.
So loads of people turned up…
…and it was a total disaster
A post shared by Lardy Ladies blog (@evajgeorge) on
The main problem? No cheese
The only thing giant about this cheese board was that it was a total giant waste of time. 5 different types of cheese are you fucking kidding me, no giant camembert, ran out of bread, chorizo, crackers, grapes, cold mulled wine, 90 minute wait to get in #giantcheeseboard
— Kevin Chun (@peanutter571) December 16, 2017
And bad mulled wine
#GiantCheeseboard Long queue for 2 cold, tasteless cheeses, tepid watered down mulled wine. Finally! Joined the throng of people leaving. What are the chances of getting our money back???? Pigs might fly, while Tom Anderson has a pocket load of dosh. #giantcheedeboard#disgrace
— Lucy Heath (@lucyheath19) December 16, 2017
People are calling it the British Fyre Festival
Me and @hannahjdavies are at the Giant Cheeseboard which is very much the fyre festival of novelty cheese based events
— Kate Solomon (@katiesol) December 16, 2017
In bits at the UK-equivalent of #FyreFestival, a £35-a-head "immersive giant cheeseboard" that turned out to be a chaotic wasteland in a tent serving cold mulled wine and unidentified crumbled supermarket cheese #GiantCheeseboard
— Dawn Herod Foster (@DawnHFoster) December 16, 2017
Talk about crushing dreams
Feeling fully vindicated in my life-style choice of never leaving the house to do 'fun' things with other people, ever, after reading the #giantcheeseboard hashtag.
— elleven cat tree (@ell3ctric) December 16, 2017
Looks like there are some serious questions to answer here
There’s a special place in hell reserved for people who promise and don’t deliver cheese.
If you were left high and dry, make sure you keep emailing until they reply:
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